October 01, 2002
Einhorn will testify
Ira Einhorn will testify at his trial, and by $DEITY he may just tell us all about how it was Evil Guvment Agents who killed his girlfriend Holly Maddux and stuffed her body into a steamer trunk in his apartment. I have a feeling that will go over as well as Linus' Great Pumpkin speech did when he ran for class president...
Posted by Charles Kuffner on October 01, 2002 to Crime and Punishment
Surely this is a ruse. At the last minute, the Unicorn's attorneys won't "allow" him to tell his explosive story. The jury, meanwhile, if they are dolts, will buy this fabrication and be favorably inclined toward this despictable defendant.
We don't think it's a ruse. We think Ira is running the defense. His theory is that the Government framed him and put the body in the trunk in his apartment. Who else could tell that to the jury?
Defense lawyers don't often tell a jury they will hear from the defendant--because something could happen during the course of the trial that would make it too risky for the defendant to testify. Lawyers also don't like to change horses in midstream, meaning their entire defense has been planned around this theme, from voir dire of the jury panel to closing arguments, and its too late too switch now unless something totally unexpected happens.
So we think Ira will testify.
I still have my doubts, but if he does testify, at least the jury will have a chance to judge the defendant and his bizarre claims for themselves. We'll finally get to see the supposed charismatic power of "The Unicorn."