January 20, 2005
The bottom 100
Norbizness dares us to list all the movies in the IMDB Bottom 100 that we've seen. This one is easy for me:
That's it. Sometimes not being a big moviegoer has its advantages.
In case you missed it last time around, my personal Bottom 10 is here. Read the comments at your peril - you will be forcibly reminded of many, many really bad movies.
UPDATE: Both Michael in the comments, and The Chunk note that the IMDB list is skewed towards recent bad movies. This is true, which is why the staying power of a flick like Jaws 3-D is so impressive to me. Too recent to be an MST3K-style classic, too old to be on anyone's mind, too irrelevant to warrant a DVD release, and yet still crappy enough to be a Bottom 100 movie. You just have to respect that.
Posted by Charles Kuffner on January 20, 2005 to TV and movies
I've only got a 2% hit rate: The Avengers (100) and Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (91). Neither was worse that Mazes and Monsters, because nothing is worse that Mazes and Monsters.
I used to see a lot of movies, but this list is skewed towards recent crapola.
Do we count movies that we have only seen via MST3K?
If so, I've seen about a half dozen. If not, then my exposure is limited to Tarzan, the Ape Man (an excuse to show Bo Derek topless) and a partial viewing of Smokey and the Bandit 3 on HBO before turning the set off in disgust.
I will admit to seeing a few - Cop and Half, Jaws 3-D, one of the Police Academy flicks and a portion of The Avengers....but in my defense I've seen none of these in the theater - only video - and furthermore I didn't rent them.
But there are worse films not on this list...where's "Butterfly" with Ed McMahon and Pia Zadora? That was worse than the Avengers. And not to overly disparage the late Jim Varney but where the heck are the "Earnest goes to" movies?
Which is more horrifying: The fact that I've seen four of these films via MST3K, or that I saw two of the same films (Manos: The Hands of Fate and Eegah!) on their own?
I count seven that I've seen ("Glitter" was a Palm de Merde (pardon my French) winner at my annual New Years Day Bad Movie Festival (OK, I'm the sole judge, want to make something of it?)) and another two that I've taped but have yet to see. I have not seen Gigli, but I it is on my list of curiosities.
By the way, where's "Showgirls" and the Ed Wood classics "Glen or Glenda" and "Plan 9 From Outer Space"?
My contribution: "Hudson Hawk". It's one of only two movies I've ever walked out of, and this was so spectacularly, gut-wrenchingly bad I can't even remember the name of the other one.
I am pleased to report I've not seen any of those movies. I have, however, seen "King Ralph", which ought to be on that list.
Pikers. I've seen 16, and only about half of those on the job as a movie reviewer. What about the comedy team of Dudley Moore and Eddie Murphy in "Best Defense" didn't thrill you? And who needs Burt Reynolds when you have Jerry Reed pretending to be him in "Smokey & The Bandit 3"?
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a few more movies to see.
I haven't seen Mazes & Monsters, but nothing (in my experience) is worse than Eyes Wide Shut.
Those are 2 hours that I'll never get back.
To qualify as a truly bad movie in my mind, it must have been intended in all seriousness to be a good movie when something went horribly wrong. So films like the "Ernest goes to wherever" don't really count. No one way trying to make a serious movie.
Two: Rollerball and Superman IV: The Quest for Peace.
IMO, Superman IV belongs on the list; Rollerball doesn't. I'm not saying it was a good movie; just that I think there are more than 99 worse movies in existence.
BTW, my wife has paid for videos of Superman IV, Cop and 1/2, as well as the entire Jaws series, but the only one I've watched with her is the aforementioned Superman IV. (What a disappointment. Superman III wasn't great, but at least it was funny.)
Pete's mention of Armageddon reminded me of the Bad Astronomy Website's Bad Movies List. Astronomer Phil Plait reviews and nitpicks some of the silliest sci-fi movies, including Armageddon, as well as some better ones (e.g., Deep Impact). Careful, though - you might learn something if you don't watch out!