Intro: Hello, OTK readers! I'm Hope. I blog in an extremely random fashion at the Appalachia Alumni Association. I went to the LBJ School, worked two sessions as a Texas Senate staffer (for former Senator Mike Moncrief) and spent over three years in the Texas Health and Human Services Commission's Medicaid Office. Consequently, I feel highly qualified to make fun of all aspects of Texas state government. Nice to meet you all.

Being in Austin, away from home, for an entire regular session can be very hard on our state Senators and representatives. To then be called back into special session, just when they thought they could relax and resume their normal lives, has hit some of them particularly hard. One of our poor elected schmucks has gotten so desperate for...umm...companionship (cough)... that he has resorted to taking out an ad on the Austin-area cragislist.

I am a guy seeking a chick---must be hot to trot and pay her own way. I have been known to wipe my nose with the back of my hand and snort when I laugh. Drink and smoke to excess. Typically can be found most days waking at the crack of noon, then til 4 or so on the couch in my underwear hooting to Jerry Springer. I also become "all hands" very easily, and my eyes will regularly move up and down your body as you talk.

I posted the above previously, but forgot to add that my favorite time to get together is usually Sunday afternoon when I can watch car racing and golf on the TV and you will be there to get me cold brewskis (that's the correct word) out of the fridge when I need them, and are eager to warm up the nacho-cheese or to grab a new can of spray cheese out of the cupboard when mine goes cold or runs out.

Actually I am seeking a coffee drinker for evening-night sessions discussing mid-18th century British maritime policy, and or Paul Gauguin and if he actually put Mangos in his paintings or if those are bradfruits.

Isn't there some Capitol-struck messenger or intern over there who can help a brother out?

(Hat tip: Fellow Austinite Tim O. Thompson.)