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Hector Uribe may be my favorite candidate for this cycle

Anyone who can send out a press release like this is someone who can make the election season just a little more enjoyable.

In Stunning Move, Land Commissioner Candidate Hector Uribe Already up on Statewide TV

(Austin) Democratic candidate for Texas Land Commissioner Hector Uribe announced today that he’s already on TV state-wide, when the USA cable network aired “No Country For Old Men” on January 6, and twice during their programming yesterday. Uribe had a speaking role in the film, which garnered four Academy Awards…for other actors. Uribe, for his part, managed to become one of only a few actors in the film to achieve the vaulted status of not being violently murdered by the end of it.

This surprise move makes Uribe the first candidate for Land Commissioner to be up on TV state-wide this election season.

“This is the kind of publicity that makes people. Things are going to start happening to me now,” said Uribe, shamelessly pilfering a line from another movie, “The Jerk.”

Uribe’s campaign will focus on maximizing revenue from state lands to help fund neighborhood schools, while also concentrating on how the state can best promote renewable energy.

Meanwhile, Uribe’s Republican opponent threatened to shoot him last week. Uribe said he isn’t at all disturbed by the empty threat, explaining that if he can survive a Coen Brothers script, he can survive Jerry Patterson.

I presume it helps when you have Harold Cook writing those releases.

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  1. To contribute to Hector’s campaign for Land Commissioner, please visit The site is very basic at this point. We are accepting contributions through ActBlue.

  2. Hector Uribe says:

    Political Campaigns are like guerrilla warfare and improv. You work with the few elements given to you. Harold Cook is the Bill Murray of the news release. He is quick, intuitive and incisive, always moving his candidates agenda forward. I am lucky he’s on my side.

    Hector Uribe

  3. Harold Cook says:

    Hector, I would stop what I’m doing long enough to thank you for your kind words, but I’m too busy trying to kill a gopher on the golf course.

    …now where did I put that bazooka?

  4. […] has sent out some witty press releases, which endeared him to me pretty quickly, but it was also clear that he’s a sharp guy who’ll be an asset for the […]

  5. Bill Tilney says:

    I was more than pleased to see Hector Uribe throw his hat in the ring to run for Texas Land Commissioner. It has been a pleasure to know this intelligent and charismatic man over the course of the past two decades. Mr Uribe has a great legal mind and is an outstanding candidate who brings a wealth of experience to the job. I believe he has the viability to successfully compete for the Land Commissioner’s position. It will indeed be like a gunfight on the “Streets of Laredo”. Hector Uribe going head to head or mano a mano with Jerry Patterson.

    Bill Tilney, Former Mayor, El Paso
    Ex American Consul General, Ciudad Juarez

  6. […] mentioned before that Hector Uribe, the Democratic candidate for Land Commissioner, may be my favorite candidate for […]

  7. lynne whittington says:

    Just please don’t start carrying a pistol in your boot.